An Overdue Update: June 2025

Jun 23, 2025
4 min read

So I suck... at keeping this updated. It's been a very long few months - between moving, running 8Bit Summer Program, working my regular job, working my consulting job, and of course, living with cancer it's been just a little busy.

But not to worry! I do have an update for you - a really robust one. Let's get started!!

May 2025:

We finished moving into our new house, got all the rooms sorted out, and generally finished getting settled in. My brother also got married, and we had so much fun at his wedding! I'm so happy for him and his new wife Jessica (who, by the way, is secretly very funny - her vows were top-tier and I love the way that she ribs my brother!) Here are a few pictures that I really love:

I had been growing my real hair out for a while (and hating every second of it) to make sure it was long enough for me to put in my sew-in for his special day. Since I knew these photos were going to live on the walls of people's homes, I wanted to feel my most confident self. I have always loved my long hair, so having short hair has been an up-and-down emotional experience. While I know the vast majority of my friends and family think the pixie cut is very cute, personally, I don't feel that way. Don't get me wrong - I wanted to love it - even just to like it. I tried really hard - I bought products and hair things to try to make it pretty. I watched videos on how I might style it. Ultimately, I've decided that short hair just isn't for me. For my brother's wedding, I wanted to make sure that I had enough hair for the sew-in to stay attached and look/feel my best for the photos.

Just a few more thoughts about hair b/c I have FEELINGS:

Having short hair, especially after my mastectomy and before my reconstruction, gave me the worst feeling of gender dysphoria; it was hard to look in the mirror, and when I could, I didn't recognize the person looking back at me. I look at photos from that time, and I'm not sure who that person is, but what I do see is unhappiness, sadness, and pain. While I would never compare my experience with the trans experience, I have sympathy and empathy for the men and women who are experiencing these feelings - it's extremely tough to know you are one thing, uncomfortable in your clothing, and are completely unsure of who is staring back at you. It's exhausting to have people staring at you, or at least feel like they are. I get confused looks from kids, as if they are trying to figure out if I fit the paradigm for man or woman. It's better now that I've had my reconstruction, but my short hair continues to make me feel uncomfortable. This time around, I have opted for wearing wigs, and after quite a bit of research, I finally found a brand that is known for excellent daily wear wigs. I really love wearing it as it's comfortable, looks very natural, and makes me feel like me. That's all I really want - I want to feel like me again - pre-cancer, pre-all the things - and with this wig I do. It's not quite the same experience as the sew-in, but I like what I see when I'm looking in the mirror.

Alright, that's enough of that - no sad girl vibes!

June 2025:

This has been a pretty busy month for me:

I won a boudoir photo shoot, and since I had my sew-in still in, I definitely wanted to capitalize on that. The photos turned out beautifully, and while I won't be sharing them publicly (because they are spicy), I loved the experience! I really wanted to focus on my scars, and the photographer agreed. I think I want to do a whole post about the experience another time so that's all I'm going to leave it as that for now.

Today (June 23) I had another infusion session. But I've also been doing some testing in between to see how things are looking with my cancer. Here's what I found out today:

My recent blood test (which tested for cancer at a molecular level) indicates that there's no disease
My most recent CT scan indicates that the blood clot in my lungs is completely gone
I was having some pain in my arm last week and went to the ER. I also had an ultrasound scan done on that arm, and it indicated that there are no blood clots that I should be concerned about.
Lastly, my doctor outlined the plan to completion - I need 2 more negative blood tests and 2 more negative scans before we move to monitor mode. I'll have another one scheduled for August and another one scheduled for November. I'm glad that we have a plan and milestones to shoot for.